What REALLY Happened
by MellyJC
Summary: You see all those other fan fics that say "This is what happened after the game" Well....This is what REALLY happened...please reveiw and we'll love you forever.
1. MmmChicken

Disclaimer: We don't own Elmo, The horny chicken, or any of the Kingdom Hearts and Final Fantasy characters. We do dream about doing so, however ^_______^  
  
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And so it begins.Mmmm Chicken  
  
It's a breezy day on Destiny Islands, when all of a sudden.  
  
"OLD MC DONALD HAD A FARM!."  
  
Everybody shriveled in pain as they watched Sephiroth, his banjo, and cow print cowboy hat in action.  
  
Riku: MAKE IT STOP!!!  
  
Sephiroth: "E I E I OH!"  
  
Sora, rather enjoying this form of entertainment, joins in with a brown jug.  
  
Sora: With an oink oink here and an oink oink there, he-  
  
Kairi: *runs into the scene, joined by Tifa* Hey guys, I'm a lesbian!  
  
Sora stops in mid-breath while Sephiroth stops strumming on his banjo.  
  
Everyone: O_O! *gasp*  
  
Kairi: -_-; Ugh! Whatever guys.  
  
Tifa: *doesn't care, is more interested in strutting her stuff to every guy within a 10-mile radius*  
  
Wakka: * stops hoeing his Weed garden to stare at Tifa through the window *  
  
Riku: * drools *  
  
Sora: * is stupefied, and would rather like to continue playing his brown jug.*  
  
Squall: .uhm, Tifa.  
  
Melly (authoress): * trips out of an unknown closet with Cloud's boxers on her head and Cloud holding her bra* um.right.so, I heard something about a lesbian.  
  
Kairi: *slowly raises her hand * .yeah, right here.  
  
Cloud: Ha! You're a les- * looks at Tifa* oOoOo.*Melly hits Cloud in the chest*  
  
Everyone: * takes their mind off Tifa to actually laugh at Melly and Cloud *  
  
Riku: Uhm.Melly.with Cloud.just.ew.  
  
Melly: Shut yo mouth, youngin'!  
  
Riku: I'm older than you!  
  
Melly: Actually, we're the same age * wink *  
  
Riku: That's disturbing beyond alllllllll reason.  
  
Anyways..Back to the lesbian.  
  
Sora: * Absent minded* So guys, whats a lesbian?  
  
Kiari: I like girls Sora..  
  
Sora: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You like girls!  
  
Kairi: So do you!  
  
Sora: O_O! Then I'm a lesbian Too!  
  
Everyone: * Anime Fall *  
  
Sephiroth: Sora. You're not a girl!  
  
Sora: .I'm not? Oh.  
  
Squall: So Tifa, your with Kairi but you still.uhm. "enjoy" Men?  
  
Tifa: Oh Yeah.I love men * Wink, Wink *  
  
Squall: Uhm.Right.  
  
Melly: * Somehow summons a horny chicken to rape Riku because his sanity is scaring her *  
  
A chicken appears on the windowsill and stares at Riku smiling. Riku looks back a little freaked out. The chicken then pounces on Riku attempting to rape him.  
  
Riku: AAAAHHHHHHH!!!!! GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF!!!! GOD HELP ME!  
  
Everyone: * looks at Riku laughing as Melly chuckles in a corner *  
  
Riku, a little pissed off, takes out his sword and chops the chicken's head off and watches as it still runs around headless.  
  
JC(Other authoress): * Running in * Has anyone seen my-..CHICKEN! * runs up to the chicken * .My.chicken.* Stares at Riku*  
  
Riku:. * looks back and thinks: Wow.She's.amazing. *  
  
Everyone: .We can read your mind. * All stoned like *  
  
Elmo: .*Pops out* Elmo knows where you live. =) * Backs away slowly.*  
  
Riku: * A bit embarrassed that they knew what he was thinking, runs out.*  
  
JC: Oh Well. Lets roast us up some chicken! * She throws the chicken into the fire *  
  
Donald: * Bursts in * Hey Guys!  
  
Melly: I think we should have some duck too..* Says in a low evil voice * Damn..bastard. * She picks up Donald and tosses him in the fire smiling dopily *  
  
Donald: * Slowly burning * You..Bitch!  
  
Ansem: * Runs in * Smells like..CHICKEN!  
  
Melly, bored of waiting for her duck to cook decides to make out with Cloud.  
  
Sephiroth: Jesus girl.  
  
Squall: Wow.O_O;  
  
Ansem: Huh? What?  
  
Sora: COOKIE! * Nibbles on a cookie * ^_____^  
  
Tifa: .Oh.I'm so hott.* Takes off jacket giggling. *  
  
All the guys: O_O!  
  
All the girls: -_-;  
  
Fin.  
  
Lol! Yeah I decide to end it here, I'm sure your glad. Well you may not think the jokes are funny but me and Jacky(JC) Do.so.HA! Lol Sorry.^_____^ Please review.So..What will happen next? Why was Sephiroth playing a banjo? Why did Squall ask Tifa if she likes men? And Why was Riku raped by a bloody chicken!!!??? Check back for Chapter 2. We'll try to get it up ASAP. .:Melly:. ~Jacky~ 


	2. Naughty Tifa, Trix are for kids!

Disclaimer: We don't own Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy or any of the characters that may appear in the fan fic besides Melly and JC, cause well.that's us o.O;  
  
  
  
It started off as a nice, beautiful day, but since this story is about complete morons, this nice day will soon turn to terror. We start with Wakka standing in a tree screaming and waving his arms at his friends below him.  
  
Wakka: I can fly!! Just watch me!  
  
Aeirth: * Holding 4 of her 9 cats * Get down from there Wakka, or I'll sick my pretties at you =)  
  
Sephiroth: Get down Wakka, you idiot! I should give you a beating!! (Notice Sephiroth isn't playing his banjo? Hmm, what happened here?)  
  
Wakka: * Flaps his arms like a bird and make the "Kawing" noise like a seagull, as he dives off his tree, landing face first into the ground. He automatically gets up and runs around giggling like a lil school girl *  
  
Meanwhile, Sora and Riku are compromising..  
  
Riku: If I win this match you'll give me a cookie, and if you win...You'll still give me a cookie. Deal? =D  
  
Sora: DEAL!!!!!!! * Smiles sheepishly * ^______^  
  
They have some gay fight with wooden swords. And after five minutes Riku, of course, wins as Sora was distracted by a fly and got knocked out.  
  
Riku: Yay! I get the cookie.. Well I would have anyways.. But that's not the point.  
  
As Riku is just about to eat the cookie, Cloud appears from behind him and steals his cookie.  
  
Cloud: Yoink! * Cloud runs off like a lil girl giggling and nibbling on his new cookie, followed by Melly who also has a cookie in her mouth *  
  
Let me guess, your wondering where Tifa and Squall are =). "AHHHH!!!!!!!" Girly screams came from Tifa's bedroom. And everyone ran in to see what happened, Aeirth taking a bit longer because her cats were missing. There they found Tifa under Squall's dead body.. Yes.. naked.  
  
Everyone: * Gasp *  
  
Melly: Omg.how horri- * Turns around and makes out with Cloud *  
  
Sephiroth: What the hell happened?  
  
Tifa: Well Squall and I.. Uhm..yeah. And a dark figure came out of nowhere and stabbed him! And I'm uh..kinda stuck and kinda naked, anyone wanna help me out?  
  
All the guys: O_O Yes ma'am! * The guys pushed each other away as they attempt to reach Tifa and pull her out from under the dead body. *  
  
That Chinese dude: Shinobi's back! O.O  
  
..Kairi slowly walks in..  
  
Aerith's cats: o_O;  
  
Kairi: Hey guys, I heard a scream and I came as fast as I could.  
  
Aeirth: * Feeding her cats * Squall was killed while sleeping with Tifa.  
  
Tifa: Who said anything about sleeping? * She glances at the angry Kairi * Oh.Hey babe.^-^;  
  
Riku: Oh well, Squall was always saying how much better than me he was.  
  
JC: * Pops outta nowhere * Ew.A naked dead body.Ew.A naked Tifa.  
  
Sora: .Ceiling fan..* Watches the fan go round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round and round *  
  
Everyone: * Watching Sora * ..............  
  
Riku: Melly you dumb blonde. Make a damn plot! Omfg. You don't know shit you stupid bitch!!!  
  
Melly: That's mean!!!  
  
Cloud: Dun make fun of my girly..  
  
Riku: See! Your turning Cloud stupid! He called you "Girly"! What I don't get is why your with him and not me!  
  
Sephiroth: OoOoOoO..Someones Jealous!  
  
Melly: dude, Riku, You can have JC. You like her don't you?  
  
JC: Huh? ..Uhm..Do I want Riku? I'm not as sex crazed as you Melly.  
  
Melly: You should be! Its fun being a tramp, right Tifa?  
  
Tifa:... Me a tramp? Whatever.. Whore's the name -_-;  
  
Riku: Hmm.. Melly can I try something to sproose up the story?  
  
Melly: Wtf? Sproose? Anyways, well sure this isn't going anywhere anyways.  
  
Riku: * Presses his soft lips against Melly's while Cloud gets super pissed off as Melly is actually enjoying the kiss *  
  
Cloud: Off Her!!!  
  
Riku: * Breaks off the kiss, looking at Cloud, smiling then looks at Melly and blushes slightly *  
  
Everyone: .Riku..o_o;  
  
Riku, feeling all embarrassed, walks out slowly, winking at Melly and she can't help but smile, but as she turns her head to look at Cloud, her smile turns to a slight frown.  
  
Cloud: Mel..Why did you let him do that?  
  
Melly: We needed a fucking plot, plus, I can control all of you, just watch.  
  
Cloud: Oh. Sorry Mel, I love you so much, Will you forgive me?  
  
Melly: Why yes I will honey. ^_______^  
  
JC: Uh.right.why so descriptive up there? * Shudders * ..Can we like.get back to the story now? I mean, wtf is happening here? Squall's dead, and Melly's just goin around makin out with whoever she wants! I mean, come on.  
  
Melly:..I only made out with Cloud! And Plus, Riku came on to ME!  
  
JC: Big difference.  
  
Melly: Actually I think I'm going to end this. Till next time...PEACE OUT!  
  
Okay, That was the 2nd chapter, I hope you liked it (if liking it is even possible) We'll try to get the next one up next weekend maybe, and we promise to have a plot, but Melly can't promise no making out with Cloud. -_- She can't control herself. 


End file.
